The Gate is Down

So quick poll, does anyone know how much work I do a week that goes into things that people get for free and, here’s the kicker, they complain about it? Now if you didn’t understand it let me re-phrase that do you know how many hours of work I do for free that then people go and complain about? If I had to nail it down to a number I would say anywhere between 12-20 hours a week. Hours I spend writing programs like the Library Attendance Program, DCHSVote Program, my websites. All of it is FREE. I have never asked for a cent. I pay for my own hosting, I pay $20/yr for the domain names LibraryAttendanceProgram.com and DCHSVote.com. I also pay ~$6 a month to host these sites and more. I pay $20/yr for joshstrange.com and tylermccamish.com. I pay $15/yr for a service that lets me get stuff for all of you. I pay $30/month to actually download the stuff. Throw in $50/yr for cramster. Lets stop there. Lets not factor in my personal contribution of time and see how much I pay a year. Ok I pay $537 a year for OTHER PEOPLE! That is not to mention my $80+ a month for my cell phone.

So people are really grateful for what I have done. NOT!!!!!!

Josh the Library Attendance Program hasn’t worked for 5th period in a week

Josh why is the movie not working?

Josh I feel like this happens every time

Why can’t this just work?

Josh Can’t you just make it, work?

Josh why isn’t the music site working?

Josh your website messed up my games

Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh

SHUT THE HELL UP!

If I actually was doing this as my job then yes, you can tell me there is something wrong, and I don’t mind you telling me there is something wrong but I don’t want to hear about it every time I see you.

I did not break your website, you make a dumb ass mistake and broke it yourself learn how to google or learn how to debug

The music site is FREE  you don’t pay for it, that’s what free means

Why can’t the movie just work? Well the world isn’t perfect, you want me to fix that too?

And for the the rest of you it’s not my %&$%*&#&#$%&#$ problem

I pay $537 a year and I don’t see a PENNY of it! I am not asking for your money I am asking for you to either leave me alone or go about problems the right way. I am not here as your free tech support people. I get paid $40 an hour to fix problems on computers. don’t come to me with your laptop and expect me to magically pull a fix out of my butt. Also I know what i’m talking about so if I say that the RAM is bad then guess what the RAM is bad, go ahead if your retarded enough to think a faulty hard drive is causing the problem, waste your money. Go waste your money see if I care. All you all do is complain. “Oh I wish we voted on paper still” DO YOU HOW MANY LINES OF CODE I WORTE FOR THAT!?!?!?!?! Hundreds if not thousands and you ungrateful pigs can only complain. “Oh we should add this feature” yea of course we should add this feature cause you don’t have to do any work. I DO! I a crap-load of work and all I get is more work out of it. If I hear the phrase “Oh you broke it again” I am going to smack that person across the face. I am trying my best here to do what is best for everyone so forgive me if something goes south every once in a while. I just don’t understand. I am sitting at my computer trying desperately to get the movie working and I have to listen to 10 people make comments from the sidelines about how this always happens or why doesn’t it just work. I’m SICK of it. I do it all for free and all you guys do is BITCH. “Why isn’t the movie down yet” well I’m sorry I was handed a laptop not 5 min ago and told to get a movie, it takes time and it doesn’t speed stuff up when you ask “is it almost done” I’m not sitting here playing games I am working as hard as I can to get this working I don’t enjoy messing things up. Also it’s hard to get a movie when I ask everyone what they want to watch and then as soon as it starts playing everyone complains and I have to change movies or get a new one and somehow its all my fault. No, from now on when someone suggests something and everyone goes along with it than no one is allowed to complain later. That is the most annoying thing ever. I am sick of being blamed for everything. It is not my fault that the laptop that is being used to run the music server sucks. If you want a music server then give me $500 to buy a desktop to run it off of. Guys I have a job I work about 15 hours a week, I have to work on coding projects about 12hrs a week, I go to school  6hrs a day, 1hr a day to get ready for school, 30min per day I work to get ready I have about 4hrs of church I only sleep 6hrs a night on weeknights and about 9 on weekends Yes I do have free time but my life is busy by my standards and listening to you come to my house sit in my chairs, eat my popcorn, watch my movies, on my projector, on my computer, and COMPLAIN, SUCKS. I have better things to do than listen to you complain. Learn to get your own music if you have a problem with my site. Go rent to movie from BlockBuster and I promise there won’t be any problems. I don’t hate you, you just annoy sometimes and then you make it worse with your little comments like “Oh josh is pissed again” “Why do you get so mad all the time” “Calm down, there is no reason to get mad”. I love spending time with you but come on back off, im doing my best, sure the movie comes down messed up sometimes, its not perfect. I work my butt off trying to make it perfect and no one ever compliments me when everything works right but if there is one snag I have to listen to someone say “JOOOSSSHHH!” like I purposely made it mess up. Guess what I didn’t, lastly if you want to text don’t do it while we are watching a movie. It’s rude and annoying. I don’t care if you text once or twice here and there but if you are watching a movie with me/us then watch the movie instead of texting. I seriously consider buying a cellphone blocker sometimes

-Sincerely Pissed off

Josh-

Life, People, computer

So more and more I have been noticing annoying things I do (traits). One of my more annoying things is how I think things always have to add up. I think that 2 + 2 has to always equal 4 but while in the “perfect” world of math that works 2 + 2 doesn’t always equal 4 in real life. When things happen they don’t always require a reaction. Too often I think that everything said/done needs to have some sort of response from me. When someone tells me something I always assume that they meant what they said/I did something to warrant it. This is ridiculous because I know I say things (more often then not) that I don’t mean out of anger or just not thinking.

A perfect example of this is we might be in a group of friends and someone will say something like “You suck at XYZ” and I will immediately try to say something to “hit back” with (usually mean and unwarranted)  and then spend the next 5 min trying to figure out what I did to make said person say what they said and that whole 5 min I am usually mad at said person. This is stupid on a whole array of levels. First of all said person probably didn’t mean what they said in the least bit. Secondly if I retaliate then things will probably only escalate. And lastly I have just wasted ~5 min being mad at someone for no reason and over-thinking the whole situation.

To refer back the the title I feel like everything is a balancing game sometimes as in “they did this to me so I need to do this to them to make it even” I like to look back the the somewhat humorous saying something to the effect of “If everyone goes around taking and eye for an eye then all we will have is a bunch of blind people” this is funny but so true.  Where does it end? For some odd reason I feel the need to either like/love or dislike/hate people. They are categorized that way in my brain. Its very irritating because there is no “gray zone”. Not to say that people can’t switch groups its just that usually its one or the other and I don’t like thinking like that.

Pretty much what I am tring to say is Im sorry for the way I act sometimes. Im trying to change but I know Im flawed. Im sorry for the retailation. Im sorry for being a jerk. Im sorry.

Here is a comical graphic to somewhat explain how I try to apply logic to things that aren’t aways logical. I’m not as bad as the picture but, well just enjoy

OK correction I though I had that image saved off somewhere but I can’t find it right now – if I find it later all add it.

-Josh

Uncategorized

FYI – This was a paper I wrote for English class and it had to fill certain requirements but it obviously didn’t fill them all cause i got a 83% on it…. Enjoy

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What is Love

Nobody is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. It is human nature to dislike people who make mistakes. love is what holds us together. Love, a word with so many meanings. So many ways to be interpreted. So many uses. We tell people we love them but do we always mean it? We tell our friends that we love them. We tell our parents that we love them. What is love? Baby don’t hurt me for being so corny.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves. But is that love? Love isn’t a list. Love isn’t a word. Love is a feeling. Love is about forgiveness.

To often people want absolutes, they want a yes or a no. They want things to be perfect but things can’t be perfect all the time that I know. Heaven ain’t close in a place like this. Love is not perfect. Love is absolute. True love is unconditional. There is no such thing as conditional love. Love is always being there when your friend screws up. Picking them up from a party because they are too wasted to drive. Love is not asking questions. Love remains the same. Love is being there for people when they need you. Love is putting your friends before yourself. Love is commitment.

Love is not easy. Love is something that everyone strives for one way or another but few achieve. People want things to come to them, they want things to come easy. Love does not come easy. You have to work for love and too many people don’t care enough to put in the time. Those are the people who are missing out. They will never understand what it is like to have a relationship or a friendship in which you can trust the other person with anything. That kind of trust is hard to come by. Love is trusting.

Love has no age limit. Love is everlasting. All of these things make up and clarify love. Love is all about forgiveness If you truly love someone you will always love them. You don’t always have to like them but you will always love them. They will let you down. You will always love them. They will hurt you. You will always love them. They will make mistakes. You will always love them. Love does no always do the right thing. But true love surpasses all faults. It does not ignore them but sees through them. Love does not judge. Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends (John 15:13).

Love in its self is absolute. But love in practice is not. If you want love then be prepared for the highs and the lows, the mountains and the valleys, the good times and the bad times, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, in life and death. Love is never going to give you up. Love will never let you down.

English, Friends, Life, Love, People, Relationships, school

FYI – This was a paper I wrote for english class and while it lacks some of the “voice” that I might have added had it been written only as a blog I think you will enjoy it

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Why I hate English

I don’t hate school. I don’t hate science. I don’t hate math. I don’t even hate history. I hate English. This is not a slam to English teachers, just the subject that they unfortunately chose. I don’t understand why I am required to take four years of English while every other subject only requires three credits. This tells me that the school and colleges think English is 33% more important than all the other subjects. This number perplexes me because last time I checked the biggest growing industry is not newspaper writing. That however is not the main reason I hate English.

Two plus two equals four. Six molecules of water and six molecules of carbon dioxide make one molecule of sugar and six molecules of oxygen. The Declaration of Independence was signed on July 4, 1776.  These are constants; they are and will always be. I will not wake up tomorrow and hear that two plus two now equals five. English on the other hand is not exact. I would rather be facebooking than writing this; one would think “facebooking” is a verb but I am pretty sure that it is a gerund. Yeah, I bet you didn’t see that coming. Notice how I say “pretty sure”, this is because you never know for sure.

In math the teacher knows the answer 99% of the time or they can figure it out fairly quickly. That is the same for history and science. If they didn’t know the answer, we would think of them as bad teachers. Somehow we allow English teachers to tell us that they will look it up and get back to us. If you ask what happens when you combine two elements, then your science teacher can tell you what will happen. If you want to know when Abraham Lincoln was shot and where, your history teacher can tell you. Your English teacher, however, has to really think about if it is best to add a comma here or end it with a period. Some “great” writers can have some crazy sentences that are run-ons that make no sense, but your English teacher will worship the ground they walk on, because they are some famous writer who can do no wrong. That is a double standard.

So essentially my biggest problem is English is not exact. You can never say something is right or wrong with 100% accuracy. If I give the same English paper to ten different English teachers I can promise you that I will ten completely different and conflicting grades landing all over the grading scale. If I give my history study guide to ten different teachers my grade will vary by less than 10%, guaranteed. That is my “test” on how “legit” a class is. To be an effective class it must be quantifiable and by failing my “by 10 within 10%” test I have decided that English is not an effective class.

I plan on going to college to be a computer programmer, and other than mandatory English classes, I will never take English again. I fully believe that English is a waste of my time, and the time I currently spend on it could be better used for math or some other quantifiable class. I don’t hate writing. I hate my writing getting picked apart and handed back in a bloody mess. When I write, I write to get my point across. I am not writing to impress someone with my comma usage and my use of long words. I think that anyone who uses excessively long words and uses lots of commas, semi-colons, colons, etc. is only doing it to try to be better than everyone else, and in that case they are a jerk. If you can’t explain a subject or an idea in simply “layman’s terms” then you don’t understand the subject in the first place. I could spout off a ton of words that sound “high-tech” or “smart” but what would be the purpose when I could explain them to you more easily? People use this technique because they want to feel better about themselves. The truth is they are stuck up. So instead of calling these people “conceited” or “egoistical”, which would be ironic, I will just call them jerks because I have a feeling that while the walk-on-water writers that we have been so “privileged” to read so far this year, can write whatever they want. We are only allowed to express our feelings in words that would be deemed “school appropriate”.

Without a doubt, I know this will be classified as a rant (and part of it is) but please, tell me why five commas are needed in a sentence other than to look smarter. Why a semi-colon is needed when a new sentence will do just fine? The thing is, you can’t tell me. I understand the need for some commas here and there and the occasional semi-colon, but I for one can’t look at a sentence and just throw commas in. If I were to write a sentence I can put commas where they go because I write the same way I talk, I put commas in where I pause or where I am stating something that doesn’t have to be there, appositives. In the end can’t I just take the same easy out that all famous writers use? I put a comma there, or left a comma out, for a reason. If you can’t figure it out then you obviously read it wrong or you aren’t intelligent enough to see it.

English, school

So this is going to be kinda quick:

Over this weekend I want down to Kentucky (with Tyler) to stay with my next door neighbor’s (Laura Henderson) boy friend (Stephen Brown) house. If that was confusing I have drawn a picture with my awesome art skillz only second to my English skillz.

Ok So here is the “Key”

Neon Green = Dating (AND NO I did not forget to but a neon green line between tyler and I)

Black Circles = Roommates

Green Lines = House

Blue Lines = we stayed here

Ok Now that that matter is settled, we had a lot of fun (well at least I did) we spent the first evening there (Friday) at Laura/Stephens Sunday School/College outreach(?) guys house. We played some game, met some people and talked. We played one excruciating game of Shout! About movies or something like that… (cue picture)

That guy with the horns is the “Host” who I learned to hate by the end of the game. The game in which I knew maybe a total of 10 movies out of a billion. Needless to say the next time someone whips one of these out to play I will quickly snatch it away from them and snap it in two as to save everyone from otherwise certain pain.

We also played outburst (remix) and I won’t go into that because it was an enjoyable experience.

On Saturday we hung around Stephens house and then went to the UK game… Which we LOST. here is my account of part of the game

For some odd reason I wanted to do my best “300″ impression and kick the Miami fan square in the back while yelling “THIS IS KENTUCKKKKKKKKYYYYYYY!!!!” but he had 3 friends with him so I opted not to.

On Sunday we went to SS and Church and then went home.

Quick tidbits of info

1. Stephens house was FREEZING

2. Tyler SLEPT while I drove

3. I drove BOTH ways

4. When not busy sleeping or not driving Tyler complained that it was too cold in the car and his feet were cold

5. The Kentucky sandwich I had on campus was delicious

6. The sliding row of library book were cool but would be much cooler if they didn’t stop when someone was in between them

7. The elavtors at the P.O.T building talk to you (I forget what they stand for)

8. I can’t wait to go to UK next year

9. Remember to brink a UK shirt when going to a UK game…

I think that about sums it up…

as always sorry for my grammar, or lack there of, and please if you feel compelled to post a comment do it on http://thegateisdown.com not on facebook – Thanks

-Josh

Church, Facebook, Friends, Life, Tyler McCamish, UK, college, school

Written on 9/14/08

So i know most of you have been on college visits recently and so far I have gone on 3 (but really 2 cause Eastern Kentucky doesnt count) but every one I go on I just hate my life at home more and more. Yea sure I have friends here that I don’t want to ever have to say goodbye to but I want to be away from my parents so bad it hurts. I am looking at UK, OSU, University of Louisville (maybe if I like the visit), and possibly Miami as a fallback. So far UK is my top choice cause it gets me the furthest away and there computer program is not a joke but I still need to look at UoL. Pretty much as most of you know my parents are very controlling and don’t ever want to let go. I haven’t seen OSU yet but I have heard a lot of good things about it but I really really want to get away. I want to get far far away. I’m sick of the drama, I’m sick of my parents, I’m sick of my sisters, I want to leave and never look back. Yes I have learned valuable lessons from my parents but they never want to let me make my own mistakes. They are always “protecting” me. I dont think they have realized how much they have pissed me off and how alienated I am from them. If I thought I could make it on my own I would just leave, leave it all behind. I love my friends and I wouldn’t leave them without saying goodbye but my parents (and other people) don’t understand that if you love/like someone if you hold tighter you will only squeeze them to death. I want college where I can say yes without asking. When I can try new things without getting a speech. I WANT to make mistakes. I WANT to waste money on that thing that wasnt worth it. I want to come home early the morning after and say I’m never going to do that again. I want screw up. I want to be free. I don’t want to have them to fall back on. I want to hit the floor so hard it hurts. I want the pain I want to learn and I can’t do that if they constantly hold my hand. I hate how my dad requires me to tell him my passwords to my computer or my email or my XXXXX. I am sick of it I want to be free. I want to leave. I constantly have church shoved down my throat so much that i start to doubt it. I firmly believe in aspects of my faith but there are some that I don’t understand and if I ask a question like (and I’m not gay but this is one that I have been thinking about lately) “Why is it against the bible to be gay?” people will get mad at me. Well guess what SCREW THE CHURCH i have had i with blindly following something for so long. I agree with a lot of what the church says but recently I have been asking myself questions like “If the new testament changed all the rules (ie. the old testament is null thus we can eat meat from previously unclean animals) and the whole gay issue is only in the old testament (to my knowledge) then why is being gay wrong?” for too long I have taken everything at face value but screw it I want you to show me in the bible where it says you can be gay because after arguing it for so long I realized that my only argument against it was the bible says so and I actually have no idea (other than in the old testament in leviticus) where it says its wrong. But ask anyone from the church that and they will scream “UnGodly hearten devil worshiper” at you and never speak to you again. I am just pissed because my whole life has been about what my parents want for me and they think that they can rub it in I make a mistake but if I try it the other way around I get in trouble and when I say “well this is how you always treat me” and they say “well we are the parents” WELL GUESS WHAT BEING A PARENT DOESNT GIVE YOU FULL RIGHTS TO BE A DOUCHE BAG!!!!! Sometime when I get mad at them they will be like “Would you talk this way to your boss?” and I want to scream if my boss sucked as much as you do then I would QUIT! I want to be free. I want to go to college. I don’t even want to go back to my house for thanksgiving or christmas I would rather sit alone then have to talk to them. They never care about anything I do right but screw up once and you would think the sky was falling. I even hint at trying out a new church and my dad literally acts like I just slapped him and keyed his car. What makes Dublin Baptist Church so flippin special? This like that make me mad. I’m not asking to NOT go to church I just want to go somewhere else. I think i’m entitled to at least that. I always get the “as long as you live under this roof” speech (yes I know you have all heard it) and I just want to scream I can’t wait till I’m no longer dependent on you so I don’t have to put up with you! So enjoy it mom and dad while it lasts cause I can promise you that as soon as my 4 years of college are done I hope that I never have to depend on you again!

Church, Friends, Life, People, college, school

1. Engineering Design

(A113)

Mr. Roscoe

2. AP English Literature

(B275)

Mr. Barrett

3. AP Calculus AB

(A122)

Mr. Bringardner

4. Cisco II

(A116)

Mr. King

5. International Diplomacy /first semester

(B174)

Mr. Reed

5. US Government /second semester

(B153)

Mr. Turner

6. AP Computer Science AB

(A116)

Mr. King

7. AP Statistics

(A126)

Mr. King

8. Early Release

Life, People, schedule, school

So on Monday I did something that was really stupid and worst of all I didn’t do it for a good reason. I was hanging out with a friend and while we were driving somewhere he was messing around and hanging out the sun roof and window of my other friend’s car (in front of me) just fooling around. I have repetitively asked him to wear his seat belt

*Rabbit Trail*

Go ahead and call me a girl but I’m telling you my dad would be dead if it weren’t for seat belts, and an expensive car, he was driving to work one day, and funny thing he wasn’t planning on getting hit, but some drunk douche bag crossed all 4 lanes of traffic on 270 and hit the median right in front of my dad and my dad t-boned his car, ejecting the driver and leaving a BLOOD trail down the passenger side of my dads car.

*End Rabbit Trail*

Yes I know Country Road != I-270 but its still not safe and it kinda pissed me off that he never listened when I asked/told him to wear his seat belt, yes he would eventually put it on, but not before saying some stupid comment like “I don’t need to wear one” or “It’s not against the law”. Well ExCuSe me medical marijuana –> READ THIS To UNDERSTAND <– isn’t against the law but you don’t see me rushing down to the nearest “doctors office” to get a prescription, mainly because i have yet to find such a place… I kidding!

Now really what he says about the law is true, unless i am driving, but still its like flying a plane with no parachutes. Anyways after i saw that I got really mad that he was so bliss with taking his life in danger, YES YES i know he was probably never in any danger i just worry.

So when we got the were we were going I got out and started punching him for being… , well yeah. he didn’t take well to that seeing how he saw it as harmless fun and told me I should have used my words, and all this time i though  “Please wear your seat belt” was a string of words… hmm,

so did I overreact? Yes, dont even try to tell me otherwise,

was I an idiot? Yes

is it my job to make sure he wears his seat belt? No

would I feel like his blood was on my hands if he died not wearing his seat belt? Yes

I know as always these thoughts are scrambled, misspelled, and hard to understand so once again thank you for reading

Car, Friends, Life, People, Relationships, death, summer

So we all know the saying that says something to the effect that we don’t see faults in our role models. But when you finally do see the faults it seems to hurt a lot. The worst is when that person calls you out on something and tells you that it is bad and not to do that and then you find out that they are guilty of the same thing. Hypocrisy is probably the most annoying thing to see in a role model and frankly it pisses me off when you find these sort of things out. Not only does it destroy a lot of trust but it makes you wonder if they are failing in one area then what else are they doing that they warned you not to do. It really makes me angry because I will just sit and wonder if things that I previously though they were below them are things that they do all the time. The perfect/near-perfect image of them is shattered beyond repair.

This is really similar to finding out thing about people at school that you previously thought we above reproach. I can’t mention any names here but if you know me then I have probably ranted about these people before. It’s not that I condemn them for what they do (drink, smoke, sex) it’s just surprising to all of the sudden find out that half of NHS/TI members aren’t the “clean” people you thought they were. It is just sad that every new person I meet now at school I have to wonder “well they seem nice but..” and it might sound harsh to assume they do stuff like that (and again I am not condemning it) I just want to tell them to “Take a bow” for putting on such a show for everyone. This year has been a huge year for finding out stuff that I was too nieve to see before. I just wish I could assume nice things instead of asking myself does this person drink, smoke, or have sex and thinking that it must be one of those. The few friends I have that don’t drink or smoke have there own problems and similarly with my friends that dont smoke. I am not pointing fingers and yes I don’t think that these thing are good things to be doing but hey I’m not perfect so I really shouldn’t judge them. To wrap up these thought that I know are scattered I just want to say one more time in this second paragraph I am NOT pointing to certain people (think of them but defiantly not calling them out on their actions

Church, Friends, Life, People, Youth Group, school

Well it’s probably not hard for some people to guess the #1 person that I hate but let’s forget about him (Doesn’t go to school anymore) for a second and move on to my next unfavorable person. Names will not be mentioned or *cough*’ed and I would like to apologize for listing names in previous posts. (They have been removed) So I went to go play volleyball today (Sunday) with some friends and I knew said person was going to be there but I really wanted to go so I went anyways. Well to give some background this person delights (I don’t know if it conscious or subconsciously) in constantly telling me things like “Oh, does that happen in your video games”, “Why don’t you go build a computer” and other ridiculous comments geared toward my heavy involvement in computers. Let me be honest, I am a geek and I know, quick plug DublinPCSquad.com, it but I would rather not be reminded by it 24/7 nor do I want it to be the only thing that defines me. Well that’s not his only favorite activity; no he rather enjoys continuously putting people down while maintaining an air of “perfectness”. Say something mean, or for that matter repeat back something he says, and he will tell you that that’s not very nice. Pretty much the biggest hypocrite I know or the Coolest Kid I Know if you are in on that. Well so we are playing volleyball right and someone hits that ball the wrong way and he goes crazy and then quickly tries to cover it but saying “I’m just kidding”. It’s like me walking up to the first person I hate and saying “Wow do you enjoy ruining people’s lives? *Small Silence* Just kidding with you Mr. ***** have a nice day *under breath* hope you fall off a cliff”. So obviously you can see how after the 100^th time or so this can get aggravating. On top of that he is so mean to his girlfriend. He will say something mean but he won’t append it with just kidding. She will tell him that she doesn’t like it when he does that and 5min later he does it again then she goes to sit off to the side and pout and he is completely obvious to the whole thing. I don’t understand how she puts up with it but whatever. Well in my book he is my “Karen the Douche” or my “you-know-what-adjective-slash-verb-goes-here Brian”. (Dane Cook) Ugh ok pretty much I just need to get that out cause this guy is a royal pain in my –Well you know.

Church, Life, People annoying, computers, dislike, dublinpcsquad.com, hate, volleyball